A complete guide on how to win your ex back
No one prepared you for this day. You are hurt, confused and emotionally drained.
Your heart feels like it’s going to break. And you can’t see how you’re going to go on without the love of your life. Sometimes you think to yourself, This heartbreak will be the death of me! No, it won’t.
You need to break. It may feel like it’s the end of the world, but guess what, it’s not. This article will help you turn the whole situation around and help you get your ex back.
See how quickly this made you glow? It seems that all you are thinking about is how to get my ex back. But before you read about the best way to get your ex back fast, you need to answer one question.
Do they still care?
This article will give you step by step tips on how to win your ex back. But if your ex doesn’t want you back in the end, then it’s nothing but a waste of your time. So before you go into it any further, you need to ask yourself:
Does he/she still care about me?
What were the reasons for the breakup?
Can you both perhaps address those reasons?
Is there any way he/she could take me back.
Think about it. Think about how the breakup happened. Put your emotions aside and think critically. If the answers to these questions are negative, then maybe you should read up on how to get over a breakup or how to get over someone.
Yes, it sucks, and yes, all you can think about is how to get back together with the ex. But if that’s an impossible mission, don’t waste your effort trying to figure out the best way to get your ex back. Remember that you are your top priority. You need to do what is best for you. And if there is absolutely no second chance with your ex, the best thing for you is to learn how to get over someone like her.
But if you’re sure he/she still cares about you, here’s how to get your ex back fast:
Give them the breakup they wanted.
No, this is not a trick. This is a real solution. To get your ex back fast, give them the breakup they wanted. Here’s why:
Right now, your brain and heart may be forcing you to prove to your ex that you still love them. You want to call her a million times and flood her phone with text messages about how much you miss her. Your instincts tell you to send them bouquets of flowers and gifts, with an apology. You probably think it’s a good idea to get drunk and show up at your ex’s door at 2 a.m. singing their favorite song. Does this sound like you? This is your broken heart talking, and the results of the above actions will not be in your favor.
All the whining and begging will anger your ex, make him want to get away from you even more, and solidify that a breakup was the best thing that could have happened to him. All the calls and texts will show your ex how desperate you are to get back together.
And that will give your ex the power to manipulate you and walk all over you when the two of you get back together. Yes, you want love again, but it’s not worth it if it’s the manipulative kind of love that one person has power over.
It’s certainly a lot to ask to give your ex the breakup she wanted. But it’s the best way to get her back. You have to trust the process and know that it will pay off in the long run. But what do we really mean when we say break up?
A breakup means: space
Give your ex the time and space they’ve asked for. Remember their favorite coffee shop? Stop going there in hopes of running into her. Find a new favorite restaurant. You don’t have to go to his friend’s party, even if you have an invitation. Even if you work in the same building, you shouldn’t mind your ex.
Giving your ex space can be very challenging! So to help you out, make a list of things you’ve always wanted to do. Those dance classes you’ve been putting off, sign up for them. All those new dishes you never had time to explore, now is the perfect time to enjoy them. In short, use this time to focus on yourself, improve and fall in love with yourself. This is also an excellent time to catch up with family members or an old friend, or with your regular pals. Anything to get your mind out of the “I want my ex back” zone.
A breakup means no contact
The “no contact” rule when trying to get back together with your ex says to cut off all communication with your ex for at least 4 weeks. And by cutting off all correspondence, we mean just that! No communication at all. Don’t even think about stalking them on social media, as this will only exacerbate your pain and anger. No calls, no texts, no comments on their photos, just radio silence.
This is probably the hardest thing you will have to do. But every time you are tempted to slip up and break the no contact rule, remember that you have to be pricked by thorns to pick a rose. Remember that the rainbow comes after a storm. Put on a mantra that reminds you that the struggle to not contact your ex will eventually pay off.
And if you do your best to not connect with your ex, you’ll find yourself thinking about him – or a lot. It’s pretty okay. But instead of thinking only about the good times, think about the bad times, too. Think about the situations that put a strain on your relationship.
Evaluate your performance in the relationship that was. What could you have done better? And in what areas would you like your partner to do better? As you focus on how to get your ex back, prepare yourself for a new healthy relationship with him or her by learning from your shortcomings.
A breakup doesn’t mean you’re going into a new relationship….
When you’re dealing with a breakup, it’s easy to hang out with someone else and show your ex that he/she was lucky when they broke up. Maybe that will bring him/her back. Because jealousy is one of the ways to get your ex back, right? Wrong.
This is a recipe for a rebound that will be a disaster and will not bring your ex back.
Yes, it’s very healthy to go out and meet new people when you’re going through a breakup. But keep these new relationships in the friend zone. Keep it casual and be honest that you’re not looking for a relationship, just a good time, especially if you still have strong feelings for your ex. Don’t add another heartache to your already aching heart.
A breakup doesn’t mean: posting your pain on social media.
It may sound petty, but that’s what most heartbroken people do. You go on social media and tell the whole world how much you’re hurting. Every day you post about how miserable you are. And when those posts don’t give your ex the attention she wants, it escalates into insults towards her. Remember we talked about not being desperate. Well, when you jump on that news bandwagon, all it says is despair.
Take a break from social media if negativity and pain are all you want to post there. And when you get to the point where you’re spending time with friends, living your best life, loving yourself and meeting new people, document it and post it. Focus on the last positive memories and milestones you achieve.
And that’s it. That’s how you get your ex back, by focusing on yourself. In case you haven’t seen the piece yet, here’s the breakdown:
Your ex wanted to break up with you. Giving them the time and space they wanted shows that you love them enough to give them what they want, even if it hurts.
Cutting off communication with your ex allows you both to grieve and evaluate the relationship you had. And maybe, just maybe, your ex will start to wonder if breaking up was the answer.
As you make new friends, have the time of your lives, and document the moments on social media, the information about you will somehow come back to your ex. And when that happens, it’s up to them to decide whether or not to check in with you.
Chances are, your ex will contact you. Because as humans, we will always want what seems unattainable. This new, changed version of you will make your ex wonder if you are still the same person they once knew. Your lack of interest will further create this curiosity in them.
It all starts with a simple text message or phone call to check on you. But don’t let that stop you so easily. Don’t just walk back. Evaluate them. Ask if you want to get back together with them. Were they the love of your life? Was the breakup just a long-term problem between the two of you, or was it the end of what you both had.
If the breakup was just a problem, then you can slowly rebuild the relationship you had. And you can finally say that you know the answer to getting your ex back. If the breakup was the end, be happy for yourself. Be proud of the healing your broken heart has achieved so far. And find a new love when you are ready.