How to get your ex back: 7 things you can do
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I know you want your ex back. But you are also thinking about moving on. You know this person has flaws, but your heart still tells you to come back because sometimes you think about how good they are. You only want to be with this person again, for better or for worse. And you know something? More than 80% of us think about it when we separate.
Then you cry, maybe even look at the sky, maybe even pray and think: “Please…. Just let me go back with my ex. I hope my ex is just making a mistake and hasn’t thought it through. I know we’re perfect for each other. I just want to call my ex and say “I love you”. Then every half hour you look at your phone, check your messenger, Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and damn…. Your email inbox to see if your ex(es) want to talk to you, all ready to get back together.
STOP. IT’S ALL IN YOUR HEAD.
Guess what? Your ex wanted to break up with you because he thinks something is wrong with your relationship. That it’s not going to work out.
Well, at least your ex thinks you’re not worth the trouble.
I’m sorry for breaking up with you, honey, but that’s the hard truth.
Do you remember my other post? Everybody has flaws and problems. If your partner wants to break up with you, it means that they don’t love you enough and don’t want to solve things with you.
So how can you get your ex back if they think you’re not worth it?
You need to make them feel that you are worth it.
You need to increase your value.
You need to make them feel that you are too busy for them because (a) your life is wonderful (b) you have many people who want to be with you.
For example: imagine that there is a pair of shoes that you could have bought for 50 dollars. You like it a lot, but you thought it was too expensive, so you left. The next day you came back and people started to line up outside the store just for that pair of shoes. The price of those shoes was increased to 150 dollars. Would you feel as if you had lost?
That’s exactly how you want your ex to feel.
That he/she has lost something.
You need to make your ex feel like you love him/her. If you love yourself, people will love you, including your ex.
So here’s what you need to do:
Do not contact your ex.
Your ex would think that he/she is the best person for you. This action only confirms to your ex that you are not that good, that nobody else wants you, and only confirms to your ex that he/she is right to have left you.
I have done this before. It ended in two tragedies: (a) the ex did not answer the call/responded to my message (b) the ex told me again that we will never meet again.
Do not put negativity on social media
First of all, your acquaintances will follow you and, if they see the negativity, they won’t want to approach you or introduce you to new people. Secondly, any new friend will know that you are sad and will not want to know you better or they will be infected by your sadness. Thirdly, for the friends who really care about you – you can simply follow the traditional path and meet them and cry their eyes out.
It’s really stupid to call more attention for being negative. Nobody likes that kind of attention.
Don’t get hurt
Why get hurt by someone who doesn’t care? That’s really stupid.
Don’t get involved in relationships so easily
I know that you feel hurt and probably feel useless at this moment because you feel that your ex doesn’t want you. You yearn to feel loved and wait: “My ex will know that I’m in another relationship and my ex will get jealous and beg to come back. STOP. This is not self-love. It’s called my-ex-is-still-the-centre-of-my-universe. Whatever you do, you do it because you want to win your ex back. But, in fact, everything you do from now on must be focused on yourself.
It may seem like a contradiction – recovering your ex, not trying to recover him.
But this is exactly the point.
This is what makes us human.
You always want what you can’t.
And you always want what you think is good for you. So, how can you become better? You can start with the outside (new haircut, new clothes, gain some muscles, eat healthier etc.) and with a good attitude/attitude. Participate in meditation/yoga/learning new things. Improve your external appearance and your inner attitude. Be the best version of yourself.
Go out with friends and meet new people.
Now that you are the 2.0 version, you need to show it to others. Get out more!
Start doing something you’ve been left behind.
You need to have the courage to do what you like. This is the most important point to love yourself.
For example, if you have always wanted to try riding a horse, start learning it. Sign up for a course.
If you always wanted to start a business, start learning how to do it and surround yourself with people who are doing the same.
If you always wanted to go back to your school to visit your favorite teacher, it’s time to do it.
If you always wanted to try that new restaurant and get a pedicure, do it.
This is the moment when you only have to worry about yourself.
When you go out or have new experiences, take pictures of your new and improved look. When you do your favorite things, take a picture. You can also take pictures with your friends. Cheer up. Then post on social networks like Instagram or Facebook. This will help you make new friends too! Your ex may or may not see these photos. But who cares about that? You are having fun and will attract more like-minded people. But please don’t post too much. Posting once every two days is a good amount to avoid annoying others while showing your great life.
While doing all this, don’t even try to think about your ex or what he would like. Do what you like. Be the best version of yourself.
You won’t be surprised if your ex starts to get in touch with you again anyway. Most people do.
And if he/she gets in touch with you again, treat him/her only as an acquaintance, never as an ex. Be gentle. If you don’t feel that you are ready to talk to him/her, simply ignore him/her. If he/she asks you to meet, don’t do it because even though he/she seems cured, it will still hurt when you meet again.
Do not restart the relationship just after a few phone calls/contacts.
After all, your value is much higher now. Your ex is just another stalker. Let them wait a while and take as much time as you want to re-evaluate the person before you come back. You may even find someone who loves you more than your ex!